Why You Feel Guilty About Problems You Didn’t Create

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Why do caring people feel guilty
every time they buy groceries,

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use plastics, or even open an app?

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Because somewhere along the
way, the biggest environmental

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decisions got pushed onto you.

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This is the How to Protect the Ocean
Podcast, your weekly ocean news update.

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And if you care about staying informed
about the Ocean every weekday, hit

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that follow button right now so
you don't miss tomorrow's episode.

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Today we're talking about the hidden
system behind your choices, why consumer

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guilt is so common, and what real
accountability actually looks like.

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This is based on a powerful
conversation I have on Friday.

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I'm gonna be posting that conversation
with Sarah Federman, a professor

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of Peace studies who examines
how corporations shape justice,

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sustainability, and long-term impacts.

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Now we've all felt it.

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You're standing in the store trying
to choose between two products.

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One has more packaging, one costs more.

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One may be sourced
ethically, one might not be.

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You need groceries, you're in a rush.

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You suddenly feel like saving the planet
depends on what you put in your cart.

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And it's exhausting, to be honest.

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And according to Sarah, many of these
ethical dilemmas were never supposed to

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land in your hands in the first place.

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She described how decisions about
environmental harm often travel all the

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way down the supply chain until they
reach the final person, the consumer,

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and then were left holding the guilt.

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I think it's really interesting,
like when I'm in the grocery aisle

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and I'm trying to choose a product.

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I'm always trying to choose
like what's the best one.

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And I start looking at the products
and something that always stood true

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to me and always stayed with me when I
interviewed somebody who was involved

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in product management and involved
in like, selling products online,

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especially from an environmental
standpoint to be environmentally safe.

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And what he said to me
really resonated with me.

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When you get stuff from him, this
is the Grove Collaborative.

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It was the founder of
the Globe Collaborative.

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You get it in these little bottles.

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It looks so small, but it's detergent
say, but it's the same amount of

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detergent in there that actually, you can
get from anything in the grocery store.

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And those big, big, like
four liter containers.

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The reason why they're four liter
and they're orange and they're

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yellow and they're bright colors
are green, is they stand out more.

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They're bigger, they're more
colorful, and that they're competing

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with other products, the same
products on the grocery shelf.

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So when you're standing on the
grocery aisle, you're looking at

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a competition of these products.

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And a lot of times that competition
to make them bigger, they have

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to dilute the actual soap.

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So when you use the soap,
you're trying to use more.

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They want you to use more 'cause they
want you to go back and buy more.

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But when you get it online from an
environmental sustainably sourced

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company, they're just coming in these
small bottles and you just put a little

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bit, a little tad and that's enough.

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And you start to look at that and
you're like, is that enough soap?

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Like, is that gonna take off that
stain or is that gonna make my

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entire load of laundry cleaner?

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Because when I use something
else, it requires, I use more.

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Why am I using such a little amount?

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And that's where it comes from.

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Like you look at these groceries, you
look at these islands and you're

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like, do they need to be that big?

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Do they need to have all that water in it?

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Do they need to be
certain type of plastic?

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It doesn't have to happen, but it's
that competition that makes it big.

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And it doesn't mean that consumers, when
you pick those products, because you

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can't see anything else, it doesn't mean
those consumers have no responsibility.

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It means responsibility has
been unevenly distributed.

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So like, let's be honest here.

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It's much easier for a corporation
to say, Hey, shop better than

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redesigning their package.

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Think about that.

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It's much easier for industries
to say, buy sustainably than to

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fix their sourcing transparency.

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It's much easier for governments
to tell people to conserve

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resources than to regulate waste
pollution and extraction at scale.

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And when that happens, everyday
people start blaming themselves for

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problems that they did not create.

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Think about the guilt that's put on us.

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Sarah gave a strong example with AI.

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People are now learning that data centers
use massive amounts of water and energy.

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So what happens?

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Users begin asking, should
I even use this tool?

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Am I causing harm by opening the app?

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That's a real emotional burden
because everybody's using AI.

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But one person choosing not to use a
chatbot is not the same as demanding

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better infrastructure, renewable power,
water planning, and transparent reporting

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from the companies building those systems.

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And let's be honest, these data
centers as I go in the conversation,

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you'll hear it on Friday with Sarah.

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These data centers are often put
in places where land is cheap.

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So it's usually often put in a
place where it's not that expensive.

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Marginal communities live there.

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And they have to deal
with these data centers.

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We don't know what the effects
of having those data centers.

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They're also put in areas where
there's already water problems

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because the land is cheap.

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Nobody wants to live there, and
there's already water problems.

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So they're competing with drinking
water for the people who do live there.

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So I think it's really difficult.

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You are looking at different
levels of responsibility and we

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are stuck with the bill of guilt.

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We see this in seafood all the time.

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Consumers are told, buy
sustainable seafood.

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Read labels.

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Know your species.

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Know the stock status.

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Know the fishing method.

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Know if labor practices are ethical and
if it was local, know if it was imported

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and most people just want dinner.

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Like my kids, I have two kids.

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They're older now, but things
are busy when you have kids.

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And I'm not saying anybody who
doesn't have kids aren't busy.

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We are busy.

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Everybody's busy.

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When I have kids, you know, we come home
from school, they come home, you get them

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ready, give them a snack, hopefully it's
sustainable and all this kind of stuff.

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And then you go out grocery shopping
because both my wife and I work.

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We go grocery shopping in the evening
where it's busy when there's a lot

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of other people and you're going
out and you're buying all this stuff.

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You're trying to make all these right
decisions, but you're in a hurry.

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You gotta go back.

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Our lives here in Canada
are not slowed down.

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We move 'cause we have to get them to
hockey or we have to get them to ballet

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or we have to get 'em to dance class.

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We have to get 'em to all these places.

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And if you have boys,
it's different, right?

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Like different sports, different
activities, everything's different.

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If any child, you try and put 'em in
activities like crafts and everything

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like that, arts and sciences and
music and all these different things.

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And then you have to make dinner.

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You have to buy all these products
and they need this and they need

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that and you have to make a decision.

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And we just don't have the information.

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Yeah, we talk about seafood.

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Just going back to seafood, like how
are you supposed to know all that?

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Stock status, fishing method,
labor practices were ethical.

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Is it local?

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Was it imported?

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All these different types of things.

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I just want dinner.

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I just need to fix dinner.

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And that makes it a
really difficult thing.

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But then all of a sudden you feel guilty.

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That's why better systems actually matter.

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Traceability systems, clear labeling,
strong fisheries management,

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fair labor enforcement, honest
certifications, retailers that do

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their homework for their consumers.

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Whatever happened to that?

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The actual choices matter,
but consumers cannot carry the

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entire oceans on our backs.

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It's not fair to ask.

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So what does real
accountability look like?

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It means pushing change upstream.

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That means asking a lot of questions.

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Who designed the system?

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Who profits from this system?

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Who has the power to improve the system?

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And who should be transparent
and who should be regulated?

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You'll hear it on Friday.

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Sarah also talked about
something important.

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Public pressure actually matters.

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Writing companies.

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Supporting better business matters,
showing up at local meetings matter.

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Speaking up matters.

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Collective action matters.

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Making that TikTok videos speaking
your opinion matters because once

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that movement starts, once you see
someone talking about it, you feel

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like talking about it as well.

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One person changing brands might
feel small, but thousands of people

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demanding better standards is different.

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It's a movement.

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And just like yesterday, when we move
as a collective, it works really well.

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When we move as a coalition,
it works very well.

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It gets attention and that matters.

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That matters more than you think.

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If you care deeply about the ocean,
climate or future, guilt can feel

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constant, but guilt is not a strategy.

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It's the clarity.

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The clarity is a strategy.

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You don't need to be a perfect consumer.

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You need to be an aware citizen.

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You need to make better
choices when you can.

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That's no doubt for sure, but you
have to also give yourself grace when

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you can't make those decisions, when
you don't have the information.

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And wherever possible, help move
responsibility back to where it

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belongs with the systems powerful
enough to create real change.

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Imagine grocery stores having
to be transparent and where

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these products come from.

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That means the products
themselves have to be transparent.

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Who can regulate that?

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Government can regulate that.

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Products, like even their own products,
like their own companies or private

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companies can put that on there.

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And then you'd be like, you know what, I'm
gonna buy from you 'cause you are awesome.

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It's helps when you start to push back.

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It helps when you are not the one
that has to make all the decisions.

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A lot of the times, we just
give that to ourselves.

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It's all these hidden systems
that are put on the burden on us.

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Why should we have to put the
burden on where the fisheries

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come make those decisions?

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It should just be given to us.

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We shouldn't be given the option of buying
fish that's over fished or we don't

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know where it goes in the supply chain.

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That should be a huge thing.

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Whether it's fisheries, whether
it's beef, whether it's chicken,

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whether it's vegetables or fruit.

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We should know how things are done.

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Just like we know when
Clementines come from Mexico.

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We should know when it's local and
we should know when it's organic.

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Is it truly organic?

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What makes this thing organic?

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It shouldn't just be a
hidden marketing scheme.

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The hidden system behind your choices
was built by people, and that means

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it can be rebuilt by people too.

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That's the final message I want to
give you because that is something

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that is extremely important.

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This week in podcast I told you is gonna
be inspiring because it's Earth Week.

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It is Earth Day soon, and
I want you to be prepared to

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be like, Hey, you know what?

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I wanna protect the planet.

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But not just by myself.

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I want to be in a community.

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I want to be in a collective or a
coalition or start my own or join one,

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but I also don't want to feel guilty all
the time and have the burden put on me.

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Like have the burden put on
you because you're using a

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phone that's made of plastic.

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Well, that's not your fault.

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But how about we push back on the
systems and the people who made that

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and say, why are we using plastic?

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Isn't there something alternative
that we can use or the way the plastic

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is made is not by fossil fuels.

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That's what we're gonna
learn all this week.

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We're gonna talk about Sarah
by the end of this week.

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On Friday, you're gonna
hear the full interview.

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But until then, if you want to hear
that you don't wanna miss it, follow

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How to Protect the Ocean Podcast for
more weekday ocean stories, science,

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and actions that actually matter.

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I wanna thank you so much for
joining me on today's episode of the

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How to Protect the Ocean Podcast.

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I'm your host, Andrew Lewin,
building the community of people

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who care about the ocean.

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I wanna thank you so much for joining me.

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Have a great day.

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We'll talk to you next time,
and happy conservation.